Australia Acknowledges Abuse of Process and How LAS (Legal Abuse Syndrome) Further Serves to Traumatize Victims of Sexual and Domestic Violence and Abuse

Link: How False Accusations Permanently Decimate Lives, Making it a Perfect Tool for Abusers to use Against their Victims

Link: Australia Acknowledges "Kangaroo Courts" and Abuse of Process; LAS (Legal Abuse Syndrome) is a Qualified Diagnosis; and How Domestic Violence Abusers are Finally Being Recognized for Abuse of Process Against Their Victims

..."This argument—ye olde non sequitur again—ignores (among a great many other considerations) that there are women who are battered and/or raped who are also then falsely accused by their batterers or rapists to compound the violation and conceal their crimes. In some cases, at least, feminists who deny legal abuse and its horrors abet batterers and rapists of women."

Link: Why Women Who Are Falsely Implicated as Abusers Have No Defenders

"White Collar" Domestic Violence: Sanctioned by the State

Link: How Abusers Use Fraudulently Obtained Protective Orders as State Sanctioned Licenses to Control, Stalk and Intimidate their Victims for Power and Control So Calculated that Victims may be Prevented from Attending School, Going to Work, or Even Being Able to Reside in Their Own Homes

The fraudulently obtained protective order is the new tool of abuse for abusers to obtain total power and control over their victims. The protective order is obtained using false allegations of domestic violence and abuse against the victim in an open court of law without due process or an evidentiary hearing. The protective order is then used as a state sanctioned license to stalk, harass, intimidate and continue to abuse the victim. The victim lives in constant fear that they will be arrested and incarcerated anytime the abuser chooses to place their victims in jail -- thereby playing the victims of their own crimes. This is the new "white collar" form of domestic violence and abuse. It is a tactic used by both men and women, to gain the upper hand in a divorce or custody battle, or to have a domestic partner simply removed from a lease and trespassed from their own homes. In the case of a victims' terrible misfortune of coupling with a psychopath or sociopath suffering from a narcissistic and borderline personality disorder - the protective order is fraudulently obtained by means of false accusations of domestic violence abuse simply to gain total power and control over their victims; while simultaneously intentionally inflicting emotional distress  to hurt, humiliate and publicly harm the reputations of their victims. This in and of itself allows the abuser to compromise the integrity of their victims with a permanent public record -- thereby slandering and defaming the character of their victims. This not only serves to satisfy the malicious intent of the abuser: it also renders the victim helpless in any and all attempts to plead innocence and defend themselves to law enforcement and the courts. Acts of malicious intent by way of falsifying police reports, manufacturing evidence and committing perjury in a court of law -- all crimes at a felony offense level -- go criminally unprosecuted because restraining order courts are of a civil nature, held by low level officials **with no due process**. Any attempts by the victims to file complaints or police reports of their own are useless and futile attempts to protect themselves because probable cause cannot be proven -- a victim simply cannot *prove* with tangible evidence the intent or motive of the abuser. All attempts by victims to file complaints or police reports to protect themselves DO embolden and provoke the abuser to escalate the abusive behavior toward the victim to the point where the victim cannot attend school, go to work, or even leave the premises of their own homes out of living in a constant state of fear the abuser will have them arrested on a whim: without due process and without protection the victim is ultimately under the total power and control of the abuser.  Law enforcement and the legal system (the courts, the judges, the attorneys) are all simply pawns in the sociopath's sick game of abuse of process: carefully constructed web of lies is in itself so complex that victims are powerless to prove they are the victims of abuse, not perpetrators.  Over time after victims are professionally and academically destroyed, publicly humiliated and ultimately alienated and completely isolated from their community, their friends and even their own families, the victims begin to doubt themselves and eventually lose all sense of their identities as human beings.  Many commit suicide as a result of the abuse. 

How Sociopaths and Psychopaths Use Law Enforcement and the Legal System to Abuse their Victims and Decimate their Lives: How One Man Did Not Survive the Legal Trauma -- Chris Mackney's Suicide Note

Link: Abuse of Process, Malicious Prosecution and Using Law Enforcement and the Legal System as a Tool for Power and Control - How One Man Did Not Survive the Legal Trauma

Link: Abuse of Process, Malicious Prosecution, and Using Law Enforcement and the Legal System as a Tool for Power and Control - A Victim's Suicide Note 

"The love that my daughter and I shared was truly special. She is a such a sweet, kind and gentle spirit. I am so sorry that I will not be there to see her grow into a beautiful woman. It absolutely crushed me to not be in her life over the last three years. I worked very hard as a father to build her confidence and self-esteem. She is smart, funny and considerate, but she didn’t know it yet. I pray that she realizes her strengths and her confidence in herself will continue to grow. I love you dearly, [name redacted].

My son [name redacted] was just entering Kindergarten, when I lost access to him. He is gregarious, outgoing and a great athlete. He is smart and fearless. He could have just as much fun by himself as he could with other kids. Even the older boys in our neighbourhood wanted to play with [name redacted]. It absolutely breaks my heart that I will not be able to help him grow into a man. I love you to, [name redacted]. I miss you both so much.

My identity was taken from me, as result of this process. When it began, I was a commercial real estate broker with CB Richard Ellis. I lived by the Golden rule and made a living by bringing parties together and finding the common ground. My reputation as a broker was built on my honesty and integrity. When it ended, I was broke, homeless, unemployed and had no visitation with my own children.

I had no confidence and was paralyzed with fear that I would be going to jail whenever my ex-wife wanted. Nothing I could say or do would stop it. This is what being to death or ‘targeted’ by a psychopath looks like. This is the outcome. I didn’t somehow change into a ‘high-conflict’ person or lose my ability to steer clear of the law. I’ve had never been arrested, depressed, homeless or suicidal before this process. The stress and pressure applied to me was deliberate and nothing I could do or say would get me any relief. Nothing I or my attorneys said to my ex-wife’s attorney or to the Court made any difference. Truth, facts, evidence or even the best interest of my children had no affect on the outcome.

The family court system is broken, but from my experience, it is not the laws, its the lawyers. They feed off of the conflict. They are not hired to reduce conflict or protect the best interest of children, which is why third parties need to be involved. It should be mandatory for children to have a guardian ad litem, with extensive training in abuse and aggression.

It is absolutely shameful that the Fairfax County Court did nothing to intervene or understand the ongoing conflict. Judge Randy Bellows also used the Children as punishment, by withholding access for failing to fax a receipt. The entire conflict centered around the denial of access to the children, it was inconceivable to me that he would use children like this. This is exactly what my ex-wife was doing and now Judge Bellows was doing it for her.

To all my family, friends and the people that supported me through this process, I am so sorry. I know my reactions and behavior throughout this process did not always make sense. None of this made sense to me either. I had no help and the only suggestion I got from my attorneys was to remain silent.

At first, I did what I was told, remained silent and listened to my attorneys. Then after I had given my ex-wife full custody to try and appease her, I learned about Psychopathy and emailed Dr. Samenow about my concerns and asked him for help. Of course, I was ignored. As the conflict continued, I was forced to defend myself. When that didn’t work, I thought I could get the help I needed by speaking out. There is no right or wrong way to defend yourself from abuse. Naively, I thought that abuse was abuse and it would be recognized and something would be done. I thought speaking out would end the abuse or at least get them to back off. It didn’t. When no one did anything they were emboldened.

I took my own life because I had come to the conclusion that there was nothing I could do or say to end the abuse. Every time I got up off my knees, I would get knocked back down. They were not going to let me be the father I wanted to be to my children. People may think I am a coward for giving up on my children, but I didn’t see how I was going to heal from this. I have no money for an attorney, therapy or medication. I have lost four jobs because of this process. I was going to be at their mercy for the rest of my life and they had shown me none.

Being alienated, legally abused, emotionally abused, isolated and financially ruined are all a recipe for suicide. I wish I were stronger to keep going, but the emotional pain and fear of going to court and jail [because of exorbitant child support] became overwhelming. I became paralyzed with fear. I couldn’t flee and I could not fight. I was never going to be allowed to heal or recover. I wish I were better at articulating the psychological and emotional trauma I experienced.

I could fill a book with all the lies and mysterious rulings of the Court. Never have I experienced this kind of pain. I asked for help, but good men did nothing and evil prevailed. All I wanted was a Guardian Ad Litem for my children. Any third party would have been easily been able to confirm or refute all of my allegations, which is why none was ever appointed to protect the children or reduce the conflict.

Abuse is about power and control. Stand up for the abused and speak out. If someone speaks out about abuse, believe them.

Please teach my children empathy and about emotional invalidation and ‘gas-lighting’ or they may end up like me.

God have mercy on my soul"

 - Chris Mackney (1968-2013) a victim of domestic violence abuse whose former partner used law enforcement and the legal system as a tool of power and control

Gaslighting

 "Sociopaths frequently use gaslighting tactics. Sociopaths consistently transgress social mores, break laws, and exploit others, but are also typically charming and convincing liars who consistently deny wrongdoing. Thus, some who have been victimized by sociopaths may doubt their perceptions."

Gaslighting: the Etymology of and How Sociopaths Gaslight their Victims 

The Current Conscience - What is Gaslighting?

Psychology Today: What is Gaslighting? 

How to Detect Gaslighting 

Upending the Violence Against Women Act, the New Scam by Jeff Landers, Forbes.com

How abusive men have learned to reshape domestic violence laws into another weapon of abuse: by turning police and court protections upside down

 How Abusive Men Use Law Enforcement and the Legal System to Control, Harass and Continue to Abuse Their Partners - and Learning to Defend Yourself in Court

You Are Not Responsible for Another Person's Behavior - Surviving the Legal Trauma

You Are Not Responsible for Another Person's Behavior - Surviving Gas Lighting and Table Turning 

Rethinking Charm - Charm as the New Reg Flag

When His Put Downs Sound True - Practical Words to Visit While You Rebuild Your Life

The Abusive Traits of Jekyll-and-Hyde

Andrew Balser's abusive traits include but are not limited to abusive behavior towards former partners (name calling, diminishing ex wives by calling them mentally ill, etc.); extremely controlling behavior; quick involvement (aka fast forwarding - designed to pressure women to ignore red flags); unrealistic expectations (pressure to make more money, earn more degrees, and perform all domestic chores for his comfort); isolation (pressure to move away from friends and neighbors, isolates women from their communities and support network); blames others for his problems (blames others for his drinking and his DUI's); hypersensitivity (punitive towards women who speak up, share feelings or question him in any way); cruelty to animals and children (forced his first wife to have an abortion, neglects and abuses his dog Tony); use of force during sex (sexually violent); rigid sex roles; Jekyll-and-Hyde personality (explosive mood swings, personality changes rapidly and for no apparent reason):

Warning Signs of an Abusive Man

Learning to Stand Up for Yourself: Healing and Hope for Victims and Survivors of Domestic Violence, Abuse and Trauma